Monday, August 17, 2009

Monday Blues

Said I was going to wake with vigor and get back on track today.. but just don't feel like it..

Feeling really pressured to go to places and go to shops that I have no interest in.... *Now this makes me sound really selfish... but if GOS doesn't want to do anything... basically WE DON'T!*

So now I have come across as being a real bore... I thought it would be nice that he spend some bonding time with his kids as over the years not seen that much of them... and I know that shopping isn't something he likes.. but they are not babies anymore and shouldn't need entertaining... after all if it was my daughter *Whom he has been good to but also cross with several times over the years* he would drop her off at the station and not pay for her to go on the train.. and that would be if he felt like taking her.

No.. this isn't about wars of kids at all.... and I am not wanting not to go cause he doesn't ever want to go if it is somewhere I want to... I just dont' fancy walking around clothes shops all day! Think I have reached a time in my life where if I don't want to do something I shouldn't have to explain my reasons why.. MEN don't!

I am also feeling a bit confused... one minute he is digging at me about money.. *I only ever do the food shopping, he is lucky I am not one of these wives who goes out weekly or even monthly.. or yearly to beat the credit card for clothes or naff stuff like that!* and then the kids say he is paying for their trips back... now this is fine for me... but I am a little upset that he couldn't tell me this himself... maybe he thinks the kids won't tell me. *Rather odd, reminds me of the Phil Colins song.. Seperate lives.. is that the one.. will have to go look on you tube.. yes I know how to use youtube!*

No.. not the song I thought it was.. but still a lovely song!...maybe it was just the title!

Well the girls are off out today and yet none of them are up... I am going to clean the kitchen.. and wake them up... so they can get ready. Hopefully a nice day out for them.



Everyone has gone out... the house is peaceful and I still have some cleaning to do.... GOS has gone out with them.. so no doubt they won't really want feeding when they get back... but will give me the.."We never had anything to eat" and I will still end up cooking.

Have been wondering today... am I feeling miserable or am I facing facts now? Not sure... just know I don't feel right... but then don't think I have for a long time.

Just sent Daughter a message asking her when she can come over next... I miss her terribly.. *So much just writing that has made me fill up.. must be hormonal.. so do you think I would get away with murder?*

Do you ever have those days when you just want to scream... when you want things your way or no way... OMG I am turning into GOS! Do we do that... over time? Turn into our partners and then have to listen to them say how selfish we are blah blah and yet they don't see how much like them we have become as they want to rule the roost all the time?

To cross to type more.... grrrrrrrrrr

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